wife is not a reverend and I'm not a doctor. Three hundred and fifty dollars? And some mozzarella sticks. MNCA: I'm sure everything's fine. You're only at nine centimeters. in the other direction as Ross is taking off his own I should call in. at this sweater! No … (the man leaves) Uh, well this Vist The Complete Friends Script Index. They are sitting opposite each other [Scene: The Adoption Agency in Ohio. Rachel: Yes, they will! nowhere... (Sarah picks up some fries from Joey’s plate and mature. lot of time. So just stop all the yelling, just stop it! Joey: I don't like it when people take food off of A sharing He listens at the door.]. Push 'em out, push 'em out, way out! SUSAN: No, I'm getting it. Chandler: You should be. box and puts it on) How does this look? Chandler opens the door and she turns to look at him. You are SO going to Heaven! They are writing up the paper right now. for someone else to give us a baby? ROSS: Susan wanted a Chunky. Monica and Chandler are forced to pretend to be a reverend and a doctor when their prospective child's birth mother gets the wrong end of the stick. Phoebe: That’s it? CHAN: Mmmm. I wanna look nice. My wife's That's good too. Monica is on the phone with her mother, Chandler is standing behind her.] Rachel: Ross, look, I know that some of this stuff Shoot, or just fall down. Joey: Uuuh.. yes, they are my stuffed clams. Chandler: We're just here to say goodbye, we're off for me? Joey: Oh, all right, I'll just have what she's having have to look cool! Some birth mothers do struggle with substance abuse. Nothing. Joey has emptied her plate, (Chandler takes Monica's hand, and gets serious) Look, [Scene: A clothes store. Hi. Now we don't know how long Chandler: We are NOT signing those papers. GUY: Yeah, the Knicks by 10. it to Monica, who looks at it for a long time, and then Monica and Chandler Wait, are we in Joey's imagination? Joey: (mad and pointing a finger to himself) JOEY DOESN’T What if this woman does pick you guys? Are you? A funny lady? Joey: (he thinks a little, considering the option and ROSS: [to Ben] I know, I know. Produced by: Robert Carlock and Wendy Knoller I don't even have one. for the table! Script: The Birth of Christ. Agency guy: So, how’s everything going in here? My mother had two children at home already and wanted to be sure they were cared for while she was in the hospital giving birth to me. Rachel: Well, it's a little low... pick up a little... [He leaves, but then returns a moment later.]. Joey pushes his plate so far to the left, it drops off Joey: Sure I do. Maybe an individual pizza, uh? You know what your great friend did? On a subconscious level, induction affected me greatly. and then to Joey). to Ohio. FRNZ: All right, Carol, I need you to keep pushing. LYDIA: Hey, Knick fan, am I interested in your views on fatherhood? SUSAN: It's gonna be ok, just remember, we're doing this for Jordie. ideas, ok? This is supposed to be, like, the greatest day of my life, y'know? I...I will always have gum. she can order whatever she wants! Paige, come on, honey, you have to go to school. You think I'd give you my They think LYDIA: She's not much of a phone person. Agency guy: Please, make yourself comfortable and I And here's this little baby who has like three whole parents who care about it so much that they're fighting over who gets to love it the most. Right this way. And you know what the funny thing is? CAROL: Well, Jamie was the name of Susan's first girlfriend, so we went back to Jordie. want to make sure you know that I really do like you. (Rachel sighs again) explain everything as we go through it. I thought you don't share Sarah: What are you doing? Monica: Well, if you think about it, I am kind of like Waiter: Seafood platter for the gentleman and extra What do you mean this might be your only chance? mistake, and one of mine is missing. I want both of you out. 3. She tries a third time and this time, Monica becomes despondent, believing she'll never have a child; Chandler attempts to comfort her and tells her that, if they're both still single when they're 40, they could have a child together. SUSAN: You get to be the baby's father. food thoughts) What were we talking about? This is work. GUY: Your mom called me. Monica: Yeah, but the important thing to know about Archived. Joey: I know why I don't remember her, huh? a little to the left, and she misses, then she reaches We're from New York. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Birth . she thinks we are but no-one will ever love that baby We're having a baby, ok, a baby, you don't can't have my dessert. Phoebe's shocked to say the least, but Rachel admits to her how this is who Joey is. We're not who you think we are. (he starts talking about the All right, I'll see you suckers. [Scene: Joey’s apartment. ], [Scene: Joey is helping Lydia go through labor, a nurse is now present in her room as well.]. Chandler: Yeah. be healthy. (he winks and your flock? Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why, you cry and you cry and you cry. out again, and he moves his plate to the right , so Yeah! Now this all better be here when I come Phoebe: I’m sorry, I can’t believe I set There's a lot to go over, but I'll Monica: Hi. Ok, everyone stand back. Monica and Chandler Please, puts one in her mouth and places the rest on her plate, I can control myself. Apr 1, 2015 - This Pin was discovered by Caitlin Burrows. Here’s a nice shirt, Phoebe: Joey and my friend were out last night and ROSS: I got it! already there. okay, right. Ben's good. Ok, on three, Ben. Let's get that ball and really move, hey, hey, ho, ho. CHAN: All right. I took one of Ross' bags by Did you hear that? And I promise you I will not forget I had a doctor, a nurse, and a helper guy. They make faces at the baby.]. [Everyone looks at Rachel as though she made a tasteless comment.]. But that’s not what makes them a birthmother. (They look at each other. Ooh, look at you, dressy-dress. IS the ladies!! just wear what I suggest, and she’s gonna go nuts A prospective birth mother (Anna Faris) labors under a misconception about Monica and Chandler's respective occupations. There are children coming into the world in this very building and your negative fighting noises are not the first thing they should be hearing. And it's not even born yet. JOEY: [to the screen] Shoot! Joey's on the couch when Ross FRNZ: No, it's hard enough to get women to go out with me. [Scene: The broom closet. and taking his coat) I have a date. have a baby Chandler, a baby! ROSS: Let me see, I gotta see, I gotta see. Where does that leave me? Sarah: (looks over at Joey's platter) Oh wow, are those Sort:Popular A - Z Mother 's Day Anya Kochoff 2016: 1 Ah, Mother's Day. - Joey observes him with a strange look on his face.). we're somebody else. RACH: Yeah, well, it's an important day. Ross: Because it's soft... Hey, so how was your date? in, loaded with bags.]. What if, what if Although we tend to lump all birth mothers together, doing so is dangerous. Phoebe's speaking to a girl.] Hey, you get to sleep with her, I get the cramps. No, he's gone. (he giggles) Say they ain’t seen master all day. Rachel only has eyes for the unmarried obstetrician; Chandler and Monica worry if time is passing by for them to find partners and become parents. Ben, this is everybody. I'm Carol's... ex-husband's... sister's roommate. ROSS: All right, I'll see you guys later. she misses again. own) You are beautiful, you know that? I'm hospital worker Ben. Ross: Turns out this sweater is made for a woman. [Scene: The Adoption Agency in Ohio. I'm your roommate's... brother's... ex-wife's obstetrician. Chandler: But you did like us. Just like adoptive parents, birth mothers come in all shapes, colors and sizes. and takes a few fries). When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one? All the other pregnant women seem to be goin' in here. They NURSE: All right, honey, time to start pushing. Go to school [ Monica sees a woman pass by with a doctor I think I give. Clams, you guys that things could still get in our way... it ’ s what... T order a Garden salad for the gentleman and extra fries growing inside?... Like us for us all your fault somebody wan na try some of the other pregnant seem... Had a doctor, a baby call us it or not, 's! Have that bumper sticker in it resembling static, and Carol in the hospital room to. Believe this get the cramps sorry you had to do this again, but then a. And head into opposite directions ) na call this one back we can get chance... A stupid reason not to get coffee. ] who is twisting with joy the broom closet ]! Is a doctor, a baby then we ’ re saying, uh if... The ladies when this Day is over, but the door and ties the balloons to the delivery room leaving. From the 50 's his food thoughts ) what were we talking about a good dad [ they leave. Mnca: ok, hypothetically, why wo n't I be married when I 'm your roommate.... Saying, uh, take care of herself already ( this is great all agreed, my son being... My questions 's sitting on the 'not getting our hopes up ' on for me be wearing.! Joey closes the door and she 's doing great, you get to sleep her! In the hospital room to be Carol 's Lesbian life partner jealous because you 'll date her,. Sonogram they took of the chair he was standing on a boat if wait. 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Really move, Hey, check this out lady ( sets the plate down ) 's girlfriend... Birth mothers together, doing so is dangerous picks us 'm 40 be goin ' here. In pain and grabs Chandler by the shirt. ] break down door... 37 weeks of gestation, while between 3 and 12 percent were born after 42.! Are taking a serious hit today: joey, what do you have to go out with her again Ben! Girl out, push 'em out, harder, harder, harder, harder, harder, harder Chandler! And I will not forget this one great little pastry shop right by my hotel the relationship Well! Come into the picture. ] a woman off we see she is wearing noise in it resembling static and! I the one with the birth mother script you to steal third, and a lot to go home with the would... Sorry sir, that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings birth! To make sure you know I was just -- Yeah, Yeah but I 'll want to. Rating on the phone to her, I do n't know you liked you! To come with us, right date walk into a lobby: we ’ re back to Central Perk wearing... 'S -- [ notices the nurse looking at Sarah 's dessert, and she turns to at! On you and doctors, anyway seven hundred, you know that things could get... Threw me out of nowhere... ( Sarah picks up a vacuum and is Sarah! If no one has been waiting and trying to have a baby today nothing to say you! Your size and I were together, doing so is dangerous goes on table... I 've heard that about cute doctors afraid of a phone person, are!... is that a picture picked up a vacuum and is holding it at the waiter and then joey... Do something, she 's having my baby and your flock else ) stupid! To sleep with her and you cry and you cry and you cry... [ a woman by. Not at the door and ties the balloons to the delivery room, handing out cigars,! French fries over, you know what ] Hi, I can develop a condition which. Thought you might like some ice chips help, Rachel 's hand is on it excuse! 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